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Present and Parenting: Today’s Dad

by Eddie Rayner

It is not uncommon for Mother’s Day to be celebrated in an elaborate way, while Father’s Day passes by in a whisper. The spotlight has traditionally remained on mums and their contributions to the upbringing of their children, but is the role of dads going unnoticed? Are great fathers being celebrated enough, especially now when the current generation of dads is present and parenting?

We had the chance to speak to four fathers about their family life, and although they have very different professions, it is evident that “Dad” is their most important job.

Being a Radio Jockey and DJ means that Abhijeet Adhvaryu doesn’t have a normal 9am to 5pm schedule, and this makes time with his daughter and son challenging at times. “There can be days where I don’t see my kids because of my work commitments, but I make sure I speak to them on the phone. I think it is essential that they know I’m always there even if I’m not physically in front of them,” he says.

“Until I became a dad, I didn’t know that I had the ability to be so patient.”

Abhijeet Adhvaryu

“Because my wife and kids currently live and study in the UK, we use an app to always stay connected throughout the day,” shares Eddie Rayner, Managing Director at a publishing company, and father of a daughter and son. “Through a mobile camera in our house, I can open up the app on my phone and have a look around the house. Sometimes I’ll say into the speaker, “stop doing that!’ whenever they’re doing something they shouldn’t. It makes them feel like I’m right there,” he jokes.

“My parents were super involved, supported me, came to all my games, and exposed me to lots of cultures. I hated it as a kid, but now I understand. I appreciate what they did, and I’m doing it myself.”

Eddie Rayner

When it comes to parenting styles one dad doesn’t mind the discipline, while another wants to be the ‘good cop’.

“I would consider myself as a firm but fair father and this is exactly how my parents raised me. There are standards and expectations of how my wife and I have taught our children to conduct themselves,” says Ciaran O’Sullivan, Senior Manager of Services in the aviation industry.

“As a sporting family, the trips to and from rugby matches or training are often the times when we connect the most. A simple comment provokes a two-way conversation – when you listen, you get an insight into how they think and how they are developing.”

Ciaran O’Sullivan

Abhijeet says, “I have a hard time with having to discipline them or saying no. They know I’m the parent who will give in and give them what they want.”

Muhammad Usman Khan, a Subject Matter Expert at an airport services provider company, engages in regular dialogue with his son and daughter. “I try to be as vocal about what I expect of the kids and have a conversation with my oldest about how he feels about different things in life. We play, jump, and watch cartoons together whenever we have time,” he says.

“I show my kids that it’s not wrong for men to work around the house as well as outside. If my wife can run errands for the household, I too can help around with chores.”

Muhammad Usman Khan